TIME LAPSE

35-year-old Reena was tossing and turning in her bed, staring at the fan, counting hours left for the alarm to start buzzing and she would have to be up and, in the kitchen, preparing breakfast. She was in the final trimester of her second pregnancy and the irritating Restless Leg Syndrome was keeping her awake. There was this nagging feeling as if something was creeping up and down her legs and as if her legs had a mind of their own and very adamantly refused to settle down. She tried everything, the leg gel, oil massage, evening walks, low salt diet, dipping her legs in the saltwater bucket but in vain. And there were other discomforts of pregnancy. All she wanted was a long, undisturbed sleep that seemed to have eluded her. Sometimes she even used to weep in frustration, but daytime always brought cheer to her in the form of her daughter, Arya. She was an amazing bundle of energy, a chatterbox with the sweetest voice and most delightful expressions.

Days passed and soon it was time for Reena to deliver her baby. Her C-section was scheduled and she was more than ready, for the pregnancy was taking a toll on her. Little did she know, what was in store for her! She shared a moment of laughter with her daughter before being wheeled into the OT. She delivered a handsome little boy, Arav. And Boy Oh Boy, Arav was nothing like what little Arya had been. Reena had anticipated what would be in store for her after the little one came after all this was her second time, but all her anticipations and experience was proven wrong by Arav.

While infant Arya used to sleep peacefully by 1.30 am and 3-4 hours at stretch, Arav had a mind of his own and never more than 2 hours would he sleep. He always seemed hungry and ready to suckle. Initially, she had the help of her elders for a few months but the real struggles started later.

As Arav grew he had the most erratic timings, he used to sleep for hardly 20 minutes and then would want to be fed and be sleepy again after 45 mins. Reena was badly sleep-deprived by now. She hardly got to sleep at night and had to wake up early in the morning to get Arya ready for school. And she had no account of how her days passed juggling between two kids. There were days when she was frustrated, she craved some me time, she wished she had friends around with whom she could hang out for an hour or two, leave kids in someone’s care and just venture out of the house. Thankfully she had friends with whom she could vent and rant and a husband who helped when Arav would get cranky at night and would try his best to make him sleep. But Arav used to wake up a lot at night. There were even times when Reena would doze off while nursing him!

He grew and his mischievousness went all together to another level. He was the most adorable baby ever. The way he cooed and said his baby words could melt millions of hearts. And the tiny little fellow could get angry and how! There was no way he could be left out of sight for even a minute. Reena was on her toes all day after little Arav keeping a check on his sleep and feed schedules. He just loved food and his sleep patterns had regularised too. He used to nap in the daytime for a longer time and at night too, he started sleeping comfortably, but he would wake up in the middle of the night for no specific reason. Just as Arav would take his afternoon nap, it would be time for Arya to return from school. And then Reena would spend time with her, help her with her homework and school stuff. Ane the weekends were meant for family time. Sometimes they would go for a day outing to nearby places and at other times they would spend a carefree day home. Yet, She felt something missing, she still craved for some rest, some appreciation, some time away with friends, some me time for nothing in the house could function without her. All she wanted was a small break.

There were days when Reena felt that she was a juggler. Juggling between kids, husband and housework. She hardly had time to do something for her, her hobbies had taken a backseat and most of the time she could not even have her meal peacefully. She hardly went out by herself except if the kids had to be taken to a doctor. Yet, the love of the children, their cherubic smiles and gestures kept her strong and going. For she knew, they won’t be small and dependent forever and this time will never come back.

Kids grew, Arav started his schooling, Arya went to higher grades. Arya was in pre-teens with the usual teenage attitude. She started developing a weird teenage attitude. Keeping up with her erratic behaviour, keeping Arav’s mischief in check was one hell of a job for Reena, yet she did it with all her heart. She was a chef, a chauffeur, a teacher, a doctor, a housekeeper and what not! As and when Arya grew, her studies increased. Her higher studies imply she used to study till late or at times wake up early. Making coffee at late night or early mornings or just acting as an alarm. Helping her deal with exam stress. Reena was there with her through and through. She tried to be a friend to Arya more than a mom.  Soon Arya completed her school and left home for higher studies. Reena was prepared for that yet, she missed Arya, her talks the way she coyly would ask for advice or come to her when she had some issues with her friends. Eventually, all the attention shifted towards Arav. His school and studies, pick and drop at the sports academy, attending the game, helping him with studies. Despite the wonderful bond they shared, Arav was not as talkative, expressive and like boys usually are, he would not share every detail with Reena.  Time flew by, and Arav too left for higher studies.

Now Reena would wait for holidays when kids would be back home. When she could fuss over them all over again. When Arya would go back to her long talks and Arav to his mischievousness. When the sibling fights would drive her crazy, and when she would once again nearly forget her husband for her kids and prepare all their favourite delicacies. Mealtimes would mean all of them together for a month or two and a house filled with laughter and all the noises of a family. When she could mommy them again like old times. When she felt happiest the most.

Arya completed her studies and got a decent job and later got married. Reena was very happy that day and soon did Arav after a few years. They all lived in different cities, busy but happy in their own world. Reena was happy too. Her husband had retired, and they now used to spend time with each other happily. They started travelling extensively and started taking foreign holidays. Spending lazy afternoons doing nothing or watching movies, having late mornings. It was like the time which they sacrificed for children in their younger days, had now come back. They were free, with no responsibilities and were happily spending their days. They used to visit their children and the children used to visit them too. Though there were times, when it would be the time for summer holidays or festive season, they would miss Arya and Arav, the fuss they all used to make in the house, now it was all done routinely and quietly but happily and they knew it would always remain, it was a part of parenting. 

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It was the news of Arya delivering twins that had made Reena go back to those memories of her motherhood. She was now smiling away at all those pains and frustrations. Those nights when she couldn’t sleep and started crying. Those days when she could not be any more exhausted. When she badly felt if only, she had someone to help her with the children. When she could take a break from them and go out for some time. When she felt lonely. When nights felt longer than they were. But happy feet, toothless smiles, long stories and girly talks, sibling mischiefs kept her strong and going. The days she felt would never end, just went by like a gust of wind. She was lost in these thoughts when she heard the buzzing of her phone. It was Arya. As the call ended there was this mature, know-it-all smile on her face, as if what she was expecting had happened. Arya wanted her parents to come over and help her with the twins. They were a handful and Arya was exhausted, unable to manage them and the work and house and needed someone with her for a couple of months. Arya wanted some rest and some sleep. And Reena smiled, who would understand the struggle of what Arya was going through than her,  all she thought was “If I had to do it again a thousand times, I’d happily do it.”